Surfing with Nixon creates sense of belonging for children with autism and their families

MESA — The waves roll toward the shore as Nixon Romney waits for his turn in the lineup. 

Around him are professional surfers, volunteers and dozens of families who have come to Revel Surf Park for a day built specifically for children like him. 

He cannot hear the waves. He cannot tell his parents, at least with words, that he is ready for one. Instead, Nixon communicates the way he has learned — through his hands, pulling and showing his family what he wants. 

Then he gets his chance. 

A surfboard and a wave. A moment that, years ago, his father was told might never happen. 

“We were told since he was 18 months old that he was going to be a vegetable and I couldn’t accept that as a father,” Daniel Romney said. 

Nixon was born profoundly deaf. He has cerebral palsy, autism and significant brain damage after the central part of his brain failed to fully develop. He is one of 21 people in the world known to have a rare duplication in a gene called 7Q33. 

He has undergone six surgeries, including two that rotated his thigh and shin bones to help him walk. 

But Nixon, now 18, has never bowed to the expectations placed upon him. 

Neither has his father. 

“I tried every way possible to get him resources,” the elder Romney said. “That’s the reason we started this event, because we were struggling for a while to try to get him any type of resources.”

Romney eventually realized he could not wait for someone else to create the opportunities his son needed. 

“I couldn’t just sit on the sidelines hoping one day it would come,” he said. 

So he created Surfing with Nixon.

What began as a day just for Nixon and his friends has grown into an annual gathering for families with autistic children, bringing them together for a day in the water. 

For Daniel Romney, the event is about giving children like his son something that can be difficult to find: a place where they can simply have fun. 

“It’s really important for us as a family, and the rest of families, to be able to come and enjoy a day where they could have fun,” Romney said. “At the same time, their kid is getting surfing therapy without even knowing it’s therapy.”

The significance of Surfing with Nixon isn’t limited to what happens in the water. 

For families who spend much of their lives navigating environments that weren’t designed with their children in mind, Revel Surf Park offers a couple of other things that are just as valuable as the waves. 

Acceptance. And memories. 

Jacque Cook has brought her daughter to the event for several years. She has watched her daughter become excited about returning each year, building connections with people who understand her. 

“They honor them,” Cook said. “I know it’s made a big difference in all her and her friends’ lives, and they can have this special day to just be themselves.”

For Cook, that can be difficult to find in everyday life. 

“We come here and you know it just doesn’t even matter,” Cook said. “You just feel like you’re at home, like everyone just gets it.”

That feeling is at the heart of Surfing with Nixon.

“It gives families an opportunity to come somewhere where there’s no judgment,” said Steve Howard, the director of Surfing with Nixon. “They’re kind of all in the same boat, and it’s an even playing field here.”

The event gives children an opportunity to experience surfing in an environment built around their needs while giving parents an opportunity to watch their children play and create memories. 

“It gives them an opportunity to come out and do something that they’ll remember and build memories on, and cherish for the rest of their lives,” Howard said. 

Nixon Romney, center, stands with his cousins Jordan and Easton Jacob at a surf event.

Photo courtesy of the Romney family

Those moments that build memories often build relationships as well. 

Children remember the surfers who helped them. They ask for them when they return the following year. Families stay connected long after the event ends. 

The park becomes familiar. The faces become familiar. The feeling of belonging becomes familiar. 

“It creates a real sense of community within the autism world because they can come here and they see people from year to year,” Howard said. 

That community has become something Cook’s daughter looks forward to each year. 

“She always is talking about how she just feels so honored and touched that people would take the time to do this for them — and be understanding and accept them,” Cook said. 

For Romney, that is exactly why Nixon’s story needs to be part of the event. 

“It’s important because he’s not alone,” Romney said. “I know that there’s other kids out there that probably feel the same way, but it’s crucial for them to know they’re not alone and that they have help.”

That message has become bigger than Nixon. 

It can be seen in the families standing along the shore. It can be heard in the cheers when a child catches a wave. It can be felt in the relationships formed between children and surfers who return, year after year. 

And sometimes, Romney said, the impact is visible in the faces of parents watching from shore. 

“One of my favorites is when a mom or dad is out there seeing their kid in, and they’re smiling ear to ear, and the mom is sitting there bawling because they haven’t seen their kid smile in the last several years,” Romney said. 

For a few moments, those parents aren’t thinking about a diagnosis, doctor’s appointments, therapies or all the things that their children might not be able to do. 

They’re just watching them surf. 

That’s what Romney wanted for Nixon. Not a life defined by what doctors said he couldn’t do; not a childhood defined by limitations. 

Just an opportunity. A chance to get in the water, catch a wave and be surrounded by people who understand. 

The father who once refused to sit on the sidelines has now created a place where other families don’t have to either. 

What started with one boy has become a community. 

And every wave that rises gives that community another reason to believe in what is possible.

This article first appeared on Cronkite News and is republished here under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.