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Ebstein: A child’s questions about Rosh Hashana

Jewish New Year is Oct. 2 to 4 this year

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It’s almost time for Rosh Hashana, where we celebrate the Jewish New Year. While it’s a holiday that mostly grabs the attention of adults, it’s important to see the holiday from a child’s perspective, too.

Here are a few questions I would ask if I were a child celebrating Rosh Hashana. The parent could be any of us.

Child: If we are praying for a sweet year, isn’t chocolate better? And if you want to make it something that you would really like, you could make it dark chocolate.

Parent: Good point because chocolate is sweet. How would we drip it on an apple? I guess we could melt it. Also, wouldn’t chocolate ruin your appetite? We eat apples and honey at the start of the meal.

Child: What if, as you always make me do, I promise to eat a good meal even though I’ve had chocolate first?

Parent: Well, then we have this thing called “tradition.” It’s what we’ve always done, so we continue to do it.

Child: I remember that word. You always ask Dad why Grandma has to make Gefilte fish, which I would never eat. You won’t eat it either. Dad always says, “It’s a tradition.”

Parent: So your question?

Child: Is honey a tradition like Gefilte fish?

Parent: Got it. No. So maybe I can’t completely answer this one now, but I will think about it and get back to you. Any other questions?

Child: Yes. You always buy me a new outfit for Rosh Hashanah.

Parent (interrupting): I thought you liked that.

Child: I do, sort of. But it’s got me thinking. We pray for kindness and charity and being better people. And then, you buy me a really nice outfit, and I’m thinking, “God doesn’t care.” And also, it doesn’t match with these other things that we say matter.

Parent: That is a really good point. Next year, no new outfits for us! And that’s a promise.

Child: As long as we are making changes, can we say, “Next year, we’ll do chocolate and apples”?

Parent: Now you’re asking for a lot.

Child: But isn’t that what we ask God for? A lot? We want to be healthy, be with our family, help the poor, help us be strong. By the way, chocolate can help with that one.

Parent: OK. Maybe we’ll do chocolate next year. Are we done now?

Child: Almost. One more question. I practice playing my recorder, and everyone tells me to stop — well, except you. Then, at synagogue, they blow this loud shofar. And they do it many, many times. It actually hurts my ears. And everyone stands at attention and seems to enjoy the moment.

Parent: We’re not really enjoying the moment. We’re just noting it. We’re also feeling very serious as we think about the year ahead.

Child: OK. Well, anyway, if you could get our family to do the same for me when I play recorder, I would really appreciate it. If you want, you could call out like they do in synagogue, “Long note,” “Short choppy note,” and “Medium note.” Maybe that will help get a new attitude going. Maybe people will stand at attention for me.

Parent: I hear you. We’re going to try. It’s a new year with new habits, after all. So now, can you wash up and get dressed? We got to go.

Child: Sure, but there’s no new habit in what you just said. I guess that’s why God invented the word “future.” Our new habits — like chocolate — will be in our future.

This might be how the holiday looks to a child, and don’t we, as adults, wish we could bring back that innocence? But in 2024, with so much strife and tension around us, may we work to judge others less, listen better and affirm the blessings in our lives.

They are there, too, if we look.

To all my friends observing Rosh Hashana, may the year ahead be sweet and filled with honey or chocolate or whatever reminds us to be our best selves.

Shana Tova Umetuka. May the year ahead be good and sweet.

Jill Ebstein is the editor of the “At My Pace” series of books and founder of Sized Right Marketing, a Massachusetts consulting firm. Reader reactions, pro or con, are welcomed at AzOpinions@iniusa.org.

Rosh Hashana, Jewish New Year, Gefilte fish, apples and honey, shofar