By Michael Aurit, J.D., MDR | Aurit Center for Divorce Mediation
It took about 30 seconds after Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce announced their engagement for the media, fans and detractors to pivot to their prenup. Some say it’s a must for a couple with a high net worth. Others see it as a cold contract that undermines the very idea of “forever.”
As a mediator who has guided thousands of couples through divorce, I can say the real question isn’t whether a prenup is “good” or “bad.” It’s about what’s right for you and your partner. Anyone considering a pre-marital agreement should shake off one-size-fits-all advice — either to always get one or to avoid them entirely — and consider what makes sense for you.
A different kind of love story
For a couple like Swift and Kelce, a prenup makes practical sense. Their assets are vast, complex and tied to personal brands. Her music catalog and his business ventures are assets that can be clearly defined.
A prenup here isn’t about distrust, but rather respecting each other’s independent empires. That said, it would also be perfectly valid if they chose not to have one. Like every couple, it’s ultimately their decision.
So how do you decide?
More than a legal document
A prenup is more than a contract; it’s a conversation that affects your relationship. The process of creating one can bring couples closer by prompting them to discuss financial issues —debt, savings, spending habits and career goals — that can cause conflict later. As therapists and family law professionals often remind us, transparency builds trust.
In this way, a prenup isn’t about preparing for the worst but about thoughtfully shaping a future together.
Practical protections
Beyond celebrities, prenups make sense for many everyday couples, too. If you own a business, it’s worth deciding whether both spouses should share in its growth or whether it should remain separate. If you’re entering a second marriage with children, a prenup can ensure assets you intend for them are protected.
A prenup can clarify responsibility for debts such as student loans, safeguard inheritances or family gifts, and outline how property purchased together will be divided. Even spousal support, which is often the most sensitive topic, can be addressed with care ahead of time, avoiding bitter disputes later.
Love and lasting trust
Finally, it’s important to acknowledge the emotional side. For many, marriage is built on the promise of trust and unconditional love. A prenup, however practical, can sometimes feel at odds with that spirit — like making an exit plan before the journey has even begun.
Being asked to sign one may create a sense of doubt or fear if it feels more about protection than partnership. For couples who see marriage as a leap of faith, negotiating terms in advance can feel unsettling.
The question becomes whether the comfort and clarity a prenup might provide outweigh the possibility that it could dim the symbolism and momentum of starting a life together.
A fair and balanced agreement
Today’s prenups do not have to be the harsh, one-sided agreements people often imagine, and they more often are being deemed unenforceable.
Modern prenups, especially those created through mediation, are designed to be balanced and fair. Many even include spousal support provisions to protect both partners, particularly if one steps back from a career to raise a family or support the other’s goals.
Your marriage, your choice
The final word on prenups should always belong to the couple themselves. Outside voices will always weigh in, but the decision is deeply personal.
The most important step for spouses-to-be is having open, honest conversations — sometimes with the help of a mediator or counselor — about what feels fair and supportive for your life together.
Because in the end, no contract defines the strength of a marriage. What endures are the conversations, honesty and trust that couples build with each other. And those are things that never go out of style.
Editor’s note: Michael Aurit, J.D., MDR is co-founder of Scottsdale-based Aurit Center for Divorce Mediation. Please submit comments at yourvalley.net/letters or email them to AzOpinions@iniusa.org. We are committed to publishing a wide variety of reader opinions, as long as they meet our Civility Guidelines.
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